The Danger of Expectations

ex·pec·ta·tion

noun

1. a strong belief that something will happen or be the case in the future.

   "reality had not lived up to expectations"

I found it interesting that the example given from the dictionary was one that I so often relate to... "reality had not lived up to expectations." This is kind of an odd post, but one that I have been trying to think through for a while. Expectations seem to be a normal part of life. We expect that things will go a certain way, or at least that some things will happen. Sometimes expectations are a good thing and it allows you to prepare properly. When my family invites another family over for dinner, it is good that my mom expects them to show up. She cooks and cleans and prepares to host. If she didn't have expectations, the guests would arrive to a potentially chaotic home as we tried to last minute pull things together. However, expectations can often be a struggle for me as I place too much "strong belief" in something that will happen in the future. Plans change, people get sick and have to reschedule, weather is often unpredictable, and ultimately God's plans don't always line up with my plans (thus my selfish problem). This is a hard realization to come to grips with, and yet there is so much peace here as well. The danger lies not in just expecting things to go a certain way because I have made plans but it comes when I place all my hope and belief and joy in my plans... and then being crushed or madly disappointed when they don't go the "right way". I tend to swing more towards the extreme. The problem is that reality does not often live up to my expectations. 

One of my favorite quotes is from a book by Tom Harmon, "The refusal to die to my self is what makes me so miserable." Nearly every time I feel trapped in an Anne-of-Green-Gables-depths-of-dispair type mood, this quote pops into my head. It reminds me that the reason I am probably feeling miserable is because I am refusing to die to myself. 

There is so much to look forward to this summer, so much expectation and anticipation. It is different than it was a few weeks ago, but there is contentment. Plans have changed and reality has taken the place of some expectation, but there is still much more to expect. 

One thing that I have started to realize is that sometimes reality is better than my expectations. The most real hope that I can have is in Christ and the finished work on the cross and the expectation that He is coming back again! No matter how much imagination I employ, the reality of that glorious day will far outdo any pre-conceived ideas that I have now. It is exciting to know that there is such a deeper hope and strong belief that I can cling to, far beyond the selfish little hopes I have now, an eternal hope that will never disappoint. 

The main reason that I wrote this was as a reminder for myself. I know that this is something that I will still battle against, even now my plans for today are changing because a friend needs to reschedule a get together. There is truth that battles all the lies I hear and the truth for today is that my plans are not mine. My life doesn't belong to me and none of it is in my control. If I knew exactly how my day was going to go, I wouldn't see the many blessings as precious. One of the things I had to do today was order books for the summer... it has been on my list for a while and I finally told myself that it had to be done today. As I looked at the book list, I got overwhelmed. Then after checking with one of my friends who took the same classes last semester, she offered to let me use the exact books that I needed! Such a blessing, and a totally unplanned blessing that was different from my expectations!! As I go about my day, I need to be very careful to not place my strongest belief in anything besides Christ. He is ALL that I have and all that I need. Expectations become a dangerous thing when I place all my desires on them working out how I have planned... Something that I will need to remember and remind myself of many more times today alone.